A Talk About Friendship – Why I’ve Never Had Many Friends & How it Has Affected Me

September 10, 2018

I’m not a picky eater, the only foods I hate are smelly weird French cheeses, weird meat (not a huge huge fan of meat anyways) and I don’t like the taste of Brussel sprouts and corn but I can’t manage it if I have to.

But what I’m quite picky about I’ve realized, are who I’m friends with.

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I think I’m a pretty social person, I’m shy, but once we’ve managed to get past the few awkward first conversations, I can talk a lot. I really enjoy exchanging with other people, hearing about their life, their point of views, how they view the world, … Once I start, you can’t stop me.

However, I cannot stand people who’ll play with you, use you as a tissue, be friends with you whenever it works in their advantage or who don’t respect other people’s opinions, views or respect them in general. And unfortunately, I’m met a lot of people who have at least one of these attitudes. Which as resulted in our friendship being a short one and a “have a nice summer” and that’s it.

During my 6 years of College, except for the first two years for my 2-year post-A level course, I was never in the same class with the same people. I’ve met a lot of people, some I’ve clicked with during that year but never heard from them again because well, that’s life, and one in particular I’m still emailing very regularly. Though I’ve had the chance to meet a variety of people with different interests and personalities, I found it hard to find true friendships. It has always been something I’m a bit ashamed of, not having a huge clique of friends that I can each text on different topics, go out to have a drinks or shop with. I’ve never had that.

For a long time, I thought it was because I was not normal, that I was not interesting enough, funny enough or friendly enough. I’ve put the blame and shame on me for not being able to make true friendships. But then, I thought about it. First of all, why did all the friendships I’ve had didn’t last? And then I realized that it was because deeply, we weren’t “meant to be” friends. We had different views on life, a different personality, different interests. We had similarities, of course, that’s how the friendship started, but on the long run, it couldn’t last because we were too different. And actually, that’s okay. It  just wasn’t meant to be. I always try to remember the best from every situation (no matter how hard that can be or how  much time it can take) and these friendships have taught me things I wouldn’t have learnt otherwise.

I’m a firm believer that if someone doesn’t lift you up, celebrate your achievements and stands by you during the hard times they are just not worth it. Life is too short to clutter your life with unnecessary people.

In the end, I’m satisfied with the people who are in my life and I’m open to other amazing people entering my friends group.

Bring ’em on. (And please bring pizza too)

5 responses to “A Talk About Friendship – Why I’ve Never Had Many Friends & How it Has Affected Me”

  1. Zed says:

    It’s been a slow realisation for me as well. I’ve finally decided to focus my efforts on myself rather than half-hearted friendships.

  2. I loved this, so true. Friends may come and go and it sucks, but you have to remember the people who stick around are meant to be in your life for a reason Xx

  3. This so true. Friend is someone who inspires you ,encourages you & stay by your side always .💯❤

    Loved the ending though🍕😁

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